“Twenty-four hours later, we still do not know the winner of the presidential election,” Stephen Colbert explained at the top of The late show Wednesday evening.
He then elaborated, adding, “As you can see, I’m still on the election board because the elections are still going on – as we knew. We planned to keep this setup for days, because COVID. It will take some time to count all the votes. And it all comes down to a few states where they still count the votes. ”
Yes, it will all come back to North Carolina, Georgia, Nevada and Pennsylvania – because, as Colbert cheerfully announced in his program, “Joe Biden won Wisconsin! Court! Cheeseheads are now blue cheeseheads… That must really sting, because Trump continued to make such a big deal by winning Wisconsin in 2016. ”
Colbert then embarked on a montage of Trump describing the “beautiful” night he won in Wisconsin in 2016 by a total of 22,748 votes. “Remember when they say, ‘Donald Trump won the state of Wisconsin’. Was it a nice evening or what? He proclaimed over and over again.
“Trump put many effort in the state. In October, he attended a rally in Green Bay with quarterback Brett Favre, ”Colbert said. “Sadly, this wasn’t the first time Favre let fans down while being filmed with his dick-tator out. You can google it … but I wouldn’t. “
(Yes, Favre was once caught sending unsolicited – and unflattering – cock photos to a New York Jets reporter a few years ago.)
Then came a victory for Biden in Michigan. As Biden won over Trump in Pennsylvania, Trump took to Twitter in the wee hours of the morning Wednesday morning and proclaimed that he had in fact won not only the election but a number of undecided swing states, including Pennsylvania.
“There it is. A takeover by a terrified strong man in the middle of the night. Classic,” said Colbert. “If there’s anything 2am is known for, it’s desperate moves by sad little men. who are afraid to come home like a loser.
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